Sunday, June 04, 2017

a tale of two commencements

beware the ides of may! the ides of may is the chaos surrounding every hour of every day of the entire month of may. i was scrambling to complete any and every task that i didn't want to attempt to do with all the kids around this summer. plus, scarlett class had a party activity every day for the last 3 weeks of school. the class decided the day before what the activity would consist of and then parents were dispatched that night with the task of retrieving items to make said activity happen. i kinda hated hated it. i'm pro party, but anti party every single day and parents make it happen. 

athena blythe had her pre-k commencement first. when i showed up, i had already been 3 different places running errands and hersch was spent. plus, when i walked in the door, athena blythe was crying her heart out about falling off the slide 20 minutes prior. it was very unusual behavior for her as she is my child who doesn't get hurt. i think she was overwhelmed by all the activity and parents coming and hoopla of her class party and all that. 
so before everything even started i was already wrestling a emotionally needy herschel and a horribly distraught athena blythe. during this physical and emotional battle in front of the entirety of athena blythe's class, i knocked over my chair and flashed everyone present. they're all probably wondering where i got such great, long white bike shorts. 

athena blythe was awarded the most likely to become a veterinarian award, because she was always finding bugs and creatures in the classroom and playground to keep as pets. she even got to take home the class pet worms.  
mrs. adams and mrs. williams were an answer to prayers for what athena blythe needed this school year. i had prayed as to whether to keep her at this preschool or to move her to one closer to our new house and i felt strongly that she should remain there to get the attention she needed. she is precocious and often unmanageable and too smart for her own good, but they loved her and handled her well. 

a succession of unpleasant faces:



and one nice one:



 after the pageantry and punctiliousness of the pre-k graduation, hersch and athena blythe decided to fight over their plate of graduation goodies and flung it in the air, showering all of us with potato chips, juice boxes and sundry baked goods. i then swept up the mess and swept out with my delinquent children, slapping another child's parting gift from the teacher our of herschel's hands as we went. i then went and cried in my car. i don't cry often about childhood tomfoolery or onerous shenanigans, but i had reached my extremity that day. 



fortunately, i was better emotionally and physically prepared for reagan's 5th grade commencement, though i would add one critique that it would be nice to not have the trays and trays of cupcakes on display right in front of a toddler. or one of the PTA moms guarding the table could have had mercy on me and just given one to him. how long must i suffer? 

i also got a touch emotional during reagan's graduation. they played that super cheesy, "like an eagle i will race above the clouds" song and i sang along. i then clapped loudly for each and every single kid because so many other adults were just sitting like loser lumps. i do not understand that isolationist behavior. don't all kids need encouragement? yes! can all parents come to day time activities? no! let's help each other out!


appropriate dress is an ongoing conflict between reagan and me. i pleaded with reagan to wear dress clothes but i noticed he had sneaked on a favorite green t-shirt under his tie and button up. haha, no big deal i thought. he think's he's outsmarted me!


it wasn't until we walked to the car and he stripped off his button up and revealed that his t-shirt was just the tip of the undercover outfit iceberg. 

reagan had worn a pair of his favorite adidas three stripe sweatpants underneath his dress pants. it was only 80 degrees that day. i don't know how he survived it. 

by time we got home he was completely disrobed and had divested himself of his undesirable dress clothes.

the final day of school, they do a 5th grade hall walk. thomas was able to come and i gave the stink eye to all the "adults" using terrible language in the school hallway. then i sang at the top of my lungs a made up song that i knew reagan wouldn't like me to sing has he paraded down the hall with his class. maybe i won't be such an awkward and mortifying parent when reagan is in middle school. 

the end





5 comments:

HJolley said...

"loser lumps" is now a term added to my daily vocab. Thank you for that hilarious terminology.

I thought you were being sarcastic about the daily party in Scarlett's classroom, but by the end of the paragraph, I was like "She's being for realzzzzzzzzzzz!" How the heck do they expect parents to get stuff together the night before? That makes me want to go to bed right now (it's noon) just thinking about it.

Your hair and makeup look excellent.

Unknown said...

ditto to everything heather said!! hahahaha

and i am beyond impressed with reagan's clothing sneakery!

Unknown said...

oh - that's me - the unknown - emily - i need to figure out my google account.

Lindsey said...

"i knocked over my chair and flashed everyone present. they're all probably wondering where i got such great, long white bike shorts."

I AM SO SORRY THAT HAPPENED TO YOU AND ALSO LOVED READING THIS WITH ALL MY HEART.

I'm upset with the person who thought up having parents do stuff the night before every day for weeks. That is absurd. You are great.

Melissa said...

I'm here in the trenches (across the country) with ya sister! Just On Saturday I had to drag all six to the mall for desperately needed shoes and swimshirts and #5 bolted and the security guard brought him back a little while later saying he found him clear across the mall. Im so glad we struggle together. I don't even care what people think anymore. When they've had five boys in seven years and six kids in eleven and can pull it off better than me, they can judge me. Hang in there. Here's to hoping we can survive summer. I just love your Reagan. His smile revealing his humor and happiness just makes me happy.