Sunday, September 19, 2010

i have my moments

i thought having reagan in all day kindergarten and scarlett is pre-school twice a week would afford me more time to get things done. but it really hasn't. it's just another one of parenthood's cruel tricks. it's like when you thought that after your first baby was born and you quit your job that you would finally be able to get some stuff around the house. or that potty training would save you some money but the extra money actually goes to more toilet paper because someone is always using half the roll for their personal paperwork. OR, my personal fave, those favorite jeans that you couldn't wait to wear again post-partum? even when they zip up, they will never, EVER, ever look the same. having more time once your kids are in school is sort of like that, falsehoods, pipe dreams, myths.
not that it's all pickup lines and lunch packing. i do have my moments. wal*mart is still my personal hell, but it is nice to walk the aisles without my little buddies loudly questioning whether each person we pass has a wee wee or lady parts. or not having to deal with the tap dance of doom that precipitates the last minute run across the store to the potty. i only have to worry about myself getting across the store(but with my mom-bladder sometimes is it close). alone time at wal*mart has taken some getting used to. the only people who bother me now are the employees. sometimes i feel the need to act out and touch every banana on the shelf. or lick the bathroom wall. or announce to anyone within ear shot that i have cupcakes on my underpants. but i'm beginning to get used to it. and some days i even miss those kids.

5 comments:

Will and Natalie Giddens said...

Bahahahaha! Wee wees and lady parts. I can totally relate to those conversations. Everett told Juliana the other day that she didn't have a penis, but he did because he's a man. Times must have changed because I had no idea four years old equaled a man.

Jenna said...

True words. My kids are all gone all day long & I think I am more behind than I ever was.

JTA said...

Love it. I have a set route to the potty through target, and I am dang good at dodging peeps with my cart.
You must tell me why though. What is filling up the time? Should I be scared. I look to you for wisdom Heidi.

Sarah said...

hahaha

amen to the mom bladder and never looking hot again in jeans after having kids :)

p.s. if ever you want to borrow my santa claus necklace, just let me know. it's actually an heirloom from my mother in law.

Lindsey said...

You kill me. This was awesome.