happy glimpses in a sick world

my house is so messy right now because of the last month of illness. hurray. cough cough cough cough cough. 

it started with scarlett getting a cough that wouldn't go away that finally settled into her lungs as bronchitis with a touch of pneumonia in one lung. middle school has been great for her except for the week she couldn't breathe and she missed a bunch of school during some important tests and it was pretty darn stressful. i thought with hersch being in pre-school i would have so much more time and flexibility for more things i want to do but in reality, i've had more time to deal with more problems, sans one 3 and a half year old. i will choose to see the beauty and blessing of attending to everyone else's needs with him in pre-school. silver linings, seeing things on the sunny side, a break in the clouds, or whatever pollyannism suits you. 

she seems to be my child who requires breathing treatments when she's sick so this is old hat for her. she was not thrilled about my picture taking but the real story must be reported. i'm a slave to accuracy. 

we had fall break and general conference weekend, which will receive it's own post but during one super fun fall break activity, i looked over and spied this:

the unhappiest camper at an ice cream social. A: he already doesn't like ice cream. B: he was sick as a dog in an environment with lots of people, loud music and popping balloons. i gave him the brush off for as long as any socializing-starved mother can, then i took him home and he went straight to bed. 

he illness only got worse through general conference weekend and by tuesday when school was to resume, i made an appointment with our pediatrician. 

ways to know if reagan is sick:

1. it's quiet. there is no happy stimming or hopping or running or humming or singing happening. 

2. he's not eating. even taco soup. even enchiladas. ESPECIALLY grapes. 

3. he takes naps.

4. i have to wake him up in the morning. reagan is always up at 6am, rain or shine unless he feels like he's dying or looks like skeletor from lack of oxygen. 

he was 4/4 on all the critical criteria. 

the thing with reagan at the pediatrician is that he has a lot of "things". autism things. no tongues. no metal instruments placed in nasal passages or ear orifices. deep breaths are difficult. opening the mouth wide enough for an exam is seismic level of ornerous. we've worked on these things for years and we've seen VAST improvement, but they are still "things" and they will always be "things". it's the nature of the beast. most medical professionals are really wonderful. yet, in my experience, medical professionals tend to be fallible humans, so we've had a few experiences with people who aren't experienced enough in the art and finagle of autism. that was the case that unpropitious tuesday. we saw a great doctor whom we've had good interaction with in the past. she had a medical student with her observing and i wholeheartedly thought it was a good idea for him to observe an autistic lion with his cage rattled. however, that day, was not the day. reagan struggled with all the steps of the exam. he was scared. he was miserable. it was much harder for him to process because of his weakened faculties. i could tell the doctor was frustrated and i'm sure the observing medical student in the room put additional pressure on us all. no one is at fault in this highly fallible situation but reagan did not get the kind of exam he required and we went home with a diagnosis of a cold and some over the counter remedies. i hoped she was right in her analysis and i went to work to putting reagan at rights. but i knew it wasn't right. i knew it was more than a cold. i knew he needed more time to practice with the examination instruments. i knew that our doctor had plenty of other patients she needed to see that day too. it's terribly frustrating when everyone is clearly doing their level best. exerting your autism parent voice is critical but not always possible. sometimes things simply don't go well and that's how it has to be left. 

two days later on thursday, we were back in the doctor's office. 

reagan was only getting worse. he was barking like a dying seal and had lost even more weight. i knew we needed an actual prescription. we practiced with ears and tongues and noses and breathing and then we PRAYED. we saw a different doctor. we had no observing medical student. reagan looked like a cross between skeletor 

and steve rogers,

 pre-captain america transition. 

for the record, the nurse did not know who skeletor is. for. shame. 

we had a much less stressful examination. we were able to open just barely wide enough. ears were checked. noses were looked at. he had the clear as day diagnosis of PNEUMONIA. i shouted out loud! i pumped my fist! i knew it! i was VINDICATED! i've never been happier to hear pneumonia. what a relief to know what to do!

i picked up with horse pill sized antibiotic and within 24 hours i could hear happy reagan stimming happening in the house. he was still sluggish for a week but everything is much improved. he's been back to school. he's eating. he's regained a healthy color. he's asking me what our menu schedule is over and over and over. 

today we went back for a recheck and he still has some inflammation in his lungs so he was prescribed something else to help with that but he's doing so much better. after the doctor's appointment i told him we would go look for a halloween costume for him. the boy has some rules for an acceptable costume and most of the selections were falling woefully short. i was really trying to encourage freddie mercury as the perfect choice, but reagan has deemed people who used to be alive disqualified from halloween costume consideration. as we wandered around, i saw him looking at a darth vader costume with a happy little smile and i pounced and bought the costume. he seemed excited but still in typical reagan subdued fashion and i was thrilled because i love darth vader(but not hayden christensen, the apocryphal darth vader selection.) 

also, here's a spiritual moment i need recorded. last night while i was attempting to cook dinner(it's really a wing and a prayer situation every night. i'm the hail mary pass of dinners), reagan came up to me with a big wire hanging out of his mouth. he was alarmed and i was alarmed and upon further investigation, reagan had snapped 3 braces elastic bands and the wire was no longer attached to one side of his mouth. i tried to reattach and think of everything i could do to allay his concern and the pain of a wire poking the side of your face. i searched for our wire cutters, which were naturally nowhere to be found in our hour of need. the wire wouldn't snap off and the kitchen scissors were as useless as a macrame toilet seat cover. i was texting people i thought might have wire cutters handy but reagan was not loving this situation and each passing minute was putting him in a place of duress that i don't like to see him go. so, i suggested we pray. and he rolled his eyes. so i prayed. as i said amen, the thought burned itself into my mind, TOENAIL CLIPPERS. an instantaneous and undeniable answer to prayer. i grabbed the baby pair i carry with me in my purse at all times because i am a mom and i loathe a broken nail, gave them a quick rinse in the sink and snapped with all the strength i possess in my very muscular hands that errant wire right out of his mouth. i am still basking the in the goodness of a Father in Heaven who answers prayers, who loves my boy and me so much that he knew we needed a quick solution, even if by most accounts, this wasn't a regular crisis. He always helps. 

 the. end.