hello nastykins

big day, saturday!

pancakes!

family swimming at the YMCA!

chik-fil-a for lunch at the food court at the mall!

BUILD-A-BEAR!

the library!

running around town like an unwashed mess!

all in the name of celebrating potty training!

it was 2 year old heaven!
as our last ditch effort/reward to hammer down the final nail on the potty training coffin, we started pulling out the big stops, promising all sorts of things to help scarlett realize that potty training was here to stay. i'm not ashamed at my ploys, they totally worked. we are an accident free zone. and nothing could be nicer. scarlett has a list of things she wanted and we promised them all. except for the icee at the gas station. next time, my dear.

at build-a-bear, she picked out the cheapest bear available and i couldn't have been prouder! i was most relieved that she overlooked the talking jonas brothers bears that the two girls in front of us selected. she named her bear, flip flop, and the accessories she chose were lots of pink ear bows and a set of diapers. but most of all she likes the "bear house box" that he/she came home in. she still hasn't decided his/her gender, which makes the name flip flop even more perfect.

scarlett "putting the guts in the bear", a direct quote. you can't teach that kind of verbal eloquence. it's innate.

for reals, build-a-bear is a little place i like to call terrible. i despise the place. i dislike stuffed animals(ruffy is REAL! i promise you!) and i especially have disdain for over-priced parent traps. i know, it's a personal problem. there is nothing wrong with build-a-bear. i'm the debbie downer. i'm a big fan of capitalism and build-a-bear is making a killing and i should applaud their(nauseating) efforts.
the unwashed masses. HELLOOO NASTYKINS! we were a parade of pool water, sweat, sunblock and snarly hair. do you see that man trying to shoo us away without besmirching himself or his child? there was a bar of soap in his palm trying to ward us off. it got worse with each stop during the day. i haven't felt more filthy since girls camp 1993 when i didn't shower for 4 days. but the minions were thrilled with the long day of non-stop activities and as long as the bribes and threats hold out, i'm sure we will do it again. next i'll be penning a parenting book entitled, "look ma, no hands! how you too can bumble through your children's most crucial developmental years!"

a final note- on the way home, scarlett had an accident in the car. perfect ending to a perfect day.

don't hand me no lines and keep your hands to yourself

i recently realized something. i don't have any babies anymore. i have two fork using, sentence speaking, potty using, bed sleeping kids. it's weird. those are all things that i do too. even meatball does most of those things.

reagan update:

reagan insists on pushing the buggy whenever we are at a store that requires a buggy(grocery cart for the rest of you). in a word, it's horrible. especially if you value your ankles. in other reagan news, he's joined a baseball team, graduated from preschool, and still asks quite often when his mizzzouri friends are going to be getting alabama houses too. the big move has definitely been the hardest on him.

scarlett update:

scarlett defies death daily. she could care less about safety. and being fully dressed. we finally made it over the potty training hump. we really need to give the credit to meatball. she became fascinated by meatball being so well potty trained that she decided she wanted to be like him and "use the facilities outside". whatever works, right? she is coming to understand one of life's most cruel realities, that some things are more socially acceptable for boys to do in the yard and not for girls. there is no such thing as equality in potty training.


heidi update-

i've stayed busy with my new calling at church, back as the primary secretary. apparently, i really have something to learn in the primary organization since i keep getting called there. perhaps i need to learn to love children, be more patient and especially be more reverent in church? it hurts but i'm trying. at least i'm not den mother, right?

i've also resumed my running here. and i'll tell you what, it's a lot harder to run here. A LOT. we live in the foothills of a mountainous area and 3 miles feels like 10. and i spend 75% running in ditches and on gravel due to the lack of sidewalks and paved shoulders. i've kissed my consistent pace goodbye and i am trying to enjoy crying while i run up and down hills. the local fire department has already been called once. and it was really embarassing. but i will be more than ready for the kansas city half-marathon in october. and i just threw down the gauntlet for the rest of you considering running it too.

thomas update:

thomas has actually said, "i really like my job." and that makes me happy too. he is thriving in the humidity and can't wait for the 100+ degree weather. and only 3 short months until football season. the kids have stopped asking who "that man" is and starting calling him daddy again. his new hours are great. he's still very busy, but is enjoying more flexibility.

a special thanks to everyone for complying with my navy, black, white, blue dress code. some unwittingly. others not. too bad we never got a complete family picture.

i'm sorry mama

you certainly didn't raise me to talk like this(i can hear your voice in my head). good thing i didn't actually say any of these things. just took pictures.



mother's day at our house was fun. thomas and i both spoke in church so the kids made it even more special by being very loud and restless during our talks. it's nice to have your kids around to make you seem like even less of an authority when you are speaking on the importance of mothers.
and then after church i took a nap and then we went for a walk around the 'hood and picked flowers and strawberries in our backyard. a very little house on the prairie mother's day.

30 is nerdy

or,
why i am a happy, frugal nerd

being that i've been 30 for 24 hours now, i've realized a few things in my life.
C. this blog is really about me. the pictures at the top are just a ruse. it's really always about me. but i have a great supporting cast.
B. i OWN 30. the rest of you are just renting. pay me $200 when you pass go. i just hate the idea of getting older because the numbers get bigger.
A- i am more and more removed from being an awkward junior high student. that's a really nice perk that comes with age. i am free to embrace my frugal nerdiness because i no longer have to deal with being grouped with people who are all struggling to find their identity and don't mind tearing others down to find themselves. i've always known who i am. my parents were great at instilling that in me. i don't have to be friends with everyone anymore. i only have to be nice and polite to everyone. i get to choose my friends and my attitude towards circumstances. hurray for 30!

also, as i get older, my list of frugal nerdyisms is much longer than ever before. and that's GREAT! instead of frugal nerdyisms, i should call them heidi-isms. the two shall heretofore be synonymous.

1. i love to shower at the gym. i look forward to it. it gives me so much freedom! someone is watching the kids and i get to get ready without putting out fires. and my water bill is lower! score!
2. i love classical music. sometimes it makes me cry.
3. anglophilia. it's not as gross as it sounds. i just love british things. my netflix queue is full of british tv shows. sometimes i dream in a british accent. i used to have dreams that i was best friends with the beckham's. you know, posh and becks? i would always wake up disappointed.
4. i get obsessive about things that i like. running, hunger games, gone with the wind, crunchy corn bran cereal, perfect point plus eyeliner in espresso brown. i'm the type to attend a nerd convention. or start a nerd convention. with costumes.
5. thomas and i live for the show 24. but because i can't stay awake it's more like 12 or sometimes 18.
6. i cannot and will not pay full price for anything. it hurts.
7. i like getting up early. though i love to sleep, i hate the feeling of not having enough time in the day to do everything. so i get up early. plus, i love alone time. love it. any early morning is the only time for that.

good times never looked so good

my husband is the greatest.
he knows i am antsy about turning 30,
he knows i love surprises,
he knows i love to dress up in costume for no reason,
he knows i love cake and ice cream,
he knows i love attention to be showered upon me,
he knows i love the hunger games,
so, for the last two months, he planned a surprise 30th birthday hunger games themed murder mystery party!

he organized the food, the surprise, the secretive guest notification,

prepared two kinds of cake, chocolate and gooey butter cake

secretly read the books(which i figured out due to some good snooping and couldn't understand why he didn't tell me but i kept my mouth shut. which almost killed me but i guess it all worked out) researched and wrote 7 page murder mystery script, including a 13 district map, complete with inside jokes and gone with the wind references.

thomas led the festivities as thresh(brought back from the dead by the capitol for those of you in the know). his costume was a bungee cord tied around his waist and a pair of work gloves in his back pocket to represent thresh's agricultural district(way to go all out big T).

katniss everdeen, even at nearly 30, i still look barely 16. right?
effie trinket(who was the murderer) and plutarch(don johnson)heavensbee

madge undersee and fennick odair, both much taller than i pictured in the book.

johanna mason and cinna(who was totally NOT gay)

sweet caroline. bah ba dah. good times never looked so good.

we laughed,

we caroused,

a good time was had by all. especially me.

what my kids were up to while we partied. no sleeping. just movie watching and mess making.

it was the best night ever. i may have just as much anxiety about turning 31 so thomas is going to really have to work hard to outdo himself next year.

it's always sunny in our living room

there were tears upon my first viewing of our new rental house in alabama. it's a fine house, our house, a very, very, very, fine house. but very oddly decorated. since our move was planned and executed in a month's time, we didn't have the chance to venture to alabama to check out properties. we basically winged it through the powers of the internet. this is the result. thomas likes to refer to it as, "the olive garden without the breadsticks." i refer to it as the temple of doom.
at last, the long-awaited highlights of our new abode in alabama:

at first glance, a mild-mannered living room

but upon closer appraisal, you've entered another world.
it's always sunny in our living room. the faux sky and vine ceiling:

the bird corner, or a paint job that would even make doves cry:

our own graffiti bridge. where we can party like thieves in the temple.(3 prince references in one post! this blog has everything!)

the "marble-ized" columns and the faux brick wallpaper.

and the tin foil bathroom. a veritable faux finish faux pas.

silver leaf on the walls and broken mirror mosaics.

thanks to all the mirrors, the hall of horrors goes on forever.

the hand painted splatter paint jackson pollack phone jack in the bathroom. in case you have to take care of business while you are taking care of business.

there are about 100 of these little maryjane-style flowers hand pieced together and glued to the wall in the silver bathroom. it's like trading spaces with a budget of $13 and a hot glue gun.

it's like a dream come true. if i dreamt of living in a roller rink slash cheesy photo studio. on the vegas strip. but without all the cheap buffets and blush inducing billboards.

crackers and georgia football

on our first day of church in tuscaloosa, alabama 7 years ago, an OOOOOOLLLDD man came up to thomas and said, "hi, cracker! aren't you a georgia cracker?" the answer to that question would be yes, thomas is a white person from georgia, therefore making him by default a georgia cracker. and that's the whole story on that. it was funny. and a great way to be welcomed to a new area.

thomas is the biggest georgia fan in the universe amen. he's like those people from texas who think texas is on par with the garden of eden, but georgia is paradise on earth. and if heaven had a football team, it would be the georgia bulldogs. thomas believes, DIRECT QUOTE, "when good people die, they go to coach mark richt's house." he can't wait. on the other hand, he wouldn't pull for florida with one engine out on the plane.

saturday we attended the georgia spring football game in athens. we did all things georgia that day. we drove across the state like smokey and the bandit, we cut people off in atlanta traffic, we listened to outkast on the radio, we ate at zaxby's for dinner. on a unrelated note, i finally figured out how to use cruise control. a banner day.

the biggest relief for me was that there was no way for georgia to lose. and no fans would be picking fights. perhaps all teams should always play against themselves all the time? sunday would sure be a lot more spiritual around our house.

my favorite part was touring campus and thomas pointing out the butts-mehr facility. hahahaha. go ahead, say it again in your head.

it was no BYU (but, really what else is?), yet it was a pretty fantastic day.

for all the baby mama's mamas

So we live a life like a video
When the sun is always out and you never get old

And the {milk's} always cold
And the music is always good
And the pretty girls just happen to stop by in the hood

And they hop their pretty {bottom} up on the hood of dat pretty {swell}car

Without a wrinkle in today

Cuz there is no tomorrow
Just some picture perfect day

To last a whole lifetime
And it never ends


Cos all we have to do is hit rewind
So lets just stay in the moment, smoke {summer sausage},

Drink some {juice boxes},
Reminisce talk {a little bit} forever young is in your mind
Leave a mark that can’t erase neither space nor time
So when the director yells cut,
I’ll be fine,

I’m forever young
~lyrics by jay-z, edits by heidi